Let me be frank: After spending weeks planning diligently, and then executing my online attendance emphatically, I was left feeling…incomplete by the Veuve Clicquot Masters Polo event.

I doubt that it is the organizers alone to blame, after all, my bout of transport trouble left me arriving extremely late and cranky as all hell.

I’m told a fashion show commenced in my absence, many had begun networking and getting steadily sauced while I waded through the town of Paarl, desperately seeking a cab company that wouldn’t make me wait 2 hours for a ride to the much anticipate event.

By the time I had arrived at the Val de Vie Estate, it was to lackluster fanfare. Pretentiously titled “The Sport of Kings”, polo is one of the oldest sports still played in the world today – an exclusive debonair affair these days, from the magnificent steeds to the rules, and audience decorum. The 6th annual Veuve Clicquot Masters Polo took place on Saturday, in the Paarl-Franschoek valley, at Val de Vie Estate.

I managed to slip into the most simple, gorgeous and comfortable Ruff Tung tree print jumpsuit in black and white, with a white tuxedo jacket on top;Trust me to ensure all bases are covered, as I finished off the look with: a white headscarf, a pair of custom yellow Peacock Chandelier earrings made with jade, Japanese Glass and gold – designed specifically for lil ol’ me by Laloo Jewelry, and handmade Coast & Koi Moroccan slippers with tassels.

“A little clash aint never killed nobody.”

I was probably most excited to get near a horse again, but I did not get a chance. I honestly didn’t care to learn the rules that govern polo, because: while I appreciate the mechanisms used to keep the games-man afoot, it’s not terribly interesting unless someone chooses to swing wild at the oppositions heads, and get a little rough.

Celebrities, polo players, models and other prolific public figures graced the meticulously maintained grass with their presence, flying in from all over the country to get the opportunity to dress up, snap pictures, do picturesque interviews, and enjoy the free bubbly and catering. I rather felt I’d channel my inner Victoria Grayson, but sophistication and good pedigree are things that gallop away from me when I’m cranky, worried and hungry – Eye candy in the form of Olympic Gold Medalist Ryk Neethling, be damned!

So anyway, yes! Fashion folk! We had television and radio presenters, PR managers, stylists, agents, photographers, billionaires with Ferrari’s that were parked together all #SquadGoals like etc. You couldn’t catch a moment with the ever-busy Jeannie D who flew out of Val de Vie on a bad-ass helicopter, but Lee-Ann Liebenberg, Jennifer Su, Thulane Hadebe, Maps Maponyana, Anelisa Mangcu, Leigh-Anne Williams were some of the celebrated faces one could chat with.

Shimmy Beach hosted the afterparty which was boring after 15 minutes of the same damn trance/house music.

All-in-all, an overall rating of 5/10.

I understand the exclusive and glamorous nature of the event that already implies all attendees would likely have their own rides, but I highly recommend organizers organize a better cab/shuttle system around the Paarl area. Many would rather forgo attending in the face of such tedious distance and taxi services.