I’ve been riding a happy high these past few days. A few things fell into place, and potential was realized; and I am just ever so pleased.

With winter drawing ever so near, I wanted to escape to a place that would help reclaim the few tendrils of summer left.

I ventured a little away from my norm, to a corner of the Constantia Valley…and was arrested by the rich’s monopoly of rolling hills lined with wine estates, manor houses and unassuming town houses.

Welcome, to The Last Word Contantia.

Once you find the hotels entrance nookie, a small parking bay greets you when you drive in…and so the experience begins.

From the minute one steps in, you can tell that the hotel is built on the bones of someones home. It is very much a stately summer home vibe, with its pale pastel egg yellow walls, tiled floors and mint-garnished lounge decor. The check-in procedure is more like a lesson in getting guests placated – guided deftly by the implied Martha Steward handbook on hosting visitors. It felt like visiting a wealthy friends relative at the Hampton’s, right before the summer concluded.

After bubbles and scones(the scones were scrumptious after braving hectic traffic in the central business district), we were ushered to our room – but not before getting a look of the main pool and its deck, as well as the well-kept garden pathway brimming with Autumn-defying colorful flowers and plants.

My suite was located a hop,skip and a jump away from the main hotel area, and with good reason. For a suite of its stature, it should be afforded an audacious space.

The suite is really a Martha Steward Living guest house-style area, inviting in both decor and architectural layout. Equipped with all the fine fixings of a luxury hotel, the suite brings itself above the rest, thanks to its heated floors, expansive bathroom, a bed long and wide enough for the tall folk, and the warmest ambiance you ever did feel in a secluded hotel.

Don’t think that’s the end of it!

The Last Word Constantia decided to elevate their suite with the coup-de-gras: a private pool glowing neon blue at night.

This is the stuff of Miami rap music videos, and movie special effects. It may have been freezing this night, but I was not to miss the opportunity to experience the pool.

Architectural Style: 6/10

The Cape Dutch style architecture of the building itself is nothing spectacular (or maybe I’m just jaded from being so familiar with its aesthetic, thanks to its frequent occurrence in Western Cape estates), though functionality has its appeal. The two-storey, nine-roomed, five-suited, and four superior double roomed hotel, captivates with what grows in and around it (exterior decor), from: the suites built around the main building, to the luscious gardens, sunken pool, perfectly manicured lawn, the Oak tree preserved in the middle of the breakfast dining area, and more. The foyer maintains a low-ceiling, but houses some high quality luxury goods, guests are able to view and purchase.

I’d highly recommend the hotel finding a way to incorporate a Spa situation into their establishment, as the zen atmosphere of the entire hotel, is just begging to be appreciated in so many different relaxing ways.

Decor & Character: 8/10

I really enjoyed the soothing color scheme of the entire hotel – colorful but demure in its loudness. The plush furnishings were sophisticated, while reminding me of home with their comfort.

The thing they’ve nailed beyond a shadow of a doubt though, is the transition between indoor and outdoor. It is seamless and beautiful.

” A place of living beauty, sculpted to perfection by the passing eras. Here, at the centre of the Cape Peninsula…rise and fall of whitewashed gables. A walk down an avenue of oak trees. This is the setting for The Last Word Constantia.”

Facilities: 7/10

Choose a suite like mine, and experience: 300 thread count cotton sheets, a double room, fresh flowers, quite expansive sunny garden areas, sunken pools, in-house chauffeur services, wine-filled complimentary bars, separate lounge areas, Sherry-filled decanter, two television sets, and more.

My favorite thing about the facilities, is actually the bathing amenities. The shampoo and shower gel smell like lemon, and are ridiculously good for the skin and hair thanks to the oils in the products.

Food & Drink: 5/10

There is a kitchen open for guests to get breakfast whipped up for their dining pleasure.

I’m a fan of their really lovely fruit buffet situation.

One can socialize over bubbly, or the hotels selection of celebrated local wines. Alternatively, guests may indulge in a quiet drink, in the lounge, or around the grounds.

You’re sh*t out of luck if you need a more substantial meal the rest of the day. Have the hotel make you a restaurant booking(take their recommendations to heart – they know best!) or actually indulge in a foodie exploration of the dining wonders maybe lurking about Constantia.

Disability Accessibility & Comfort: No, 4/10

There are a few sets of steps to contend with here and there, but for the most part, The Last Word Constantia has the space to maneuver comfortably, but not the safety mechanisms to secure an individual with a disability.

Please inquire from the hotel though; in case they can accommodate your specific requirement.

Family Friendly: Yes, 7/10

There are a few sharp corners, but mostly everything can be worked around for small humans. Family’s would be well-accommodated in these rooms.

There are family rooms here, specifically too.

Location: 7/10

Constantia Valley makes this hotels location ideal for those looking for quiet and pretty.

The seclusion The Last Word Constantia has, is momentarily startling, especially considering it is within the bounds of the city of Cape Town. The hotel lies suspended in a state of intimate reclusion.

However, getting there required GPS, quick internet searches as well as a phonecall to the hotel(something really should be done about getting the exact coordinates revised to the Google Maps listed address).

Value for Money: 6/10

It’s not beyond the realm of reason, and my suite in particular is ideal for those craving a luxurious experience for a bargain.

The Last Word Constantia

Spaanschemat River Road
Constantia
Cape Town, South Africa, 7806

Tel: +27 (0) 21 794 7657